Ever wondered what the acceptable age difference in a relationship is? Or if it even matters? The truth is that it may have an impact on your relationship, but it does not have to, depending on the size of the age gap. In this article, we discuss it further. Read on to find out more.
Does an Age Difference Matter in a Relationship?
In principle, the age difference does not matter—you can date whomever you want, whether your partner is older or younger. Many successful relationships have a 10- or even 20-year age gap. However, we can’t overlook some aspects tied to your age that might impact your happiness (or its lack) with a younger or older partner. Let’s look at them now.
Emotional Maturity
When you’re dating in your 50s, you’ve lived through a good chunk of your life. You’ve had numerous different experiences and grown thanks to them. In the end, you are much more emotionally mature naturally.
In this case, you might find it more demanding to connect with a younger partner who doesn’t control or understand their feelings and your feelings as much as you do. Of course, this is not a rule—a person in their late 20s or early 30s may be as emotionally mature as you are. However, it’s more likely that you’ll meet somebody who doesn’t meet your expectations.
Goals and Flexibility
The second potential issue with an age difference in a relationship is linked to the goals and flexibility you and your partner have. A younger partner might just be starting their career (or accelerating it), so they will be more work-focused. What is more, they will likely be more flexible regarding the job they have, the location they work in, and their work-life balance.
On the other hand, a partner much older than you might value their private life more and not be as career-oriented (since they have already achieved their goals). They might also have a more fixed view of the jobs they want to take (and the companies they want to work at) and want to settle up. In this case, they might be less flexible.
Once again, let us remind you that this is a major generalization. Just because a younger or older partner is more likely to behave in a certain way does not necessarily mean that they always will!
Social Stigma
This one isn’t directly related to how you build your relationship but might affect you emotionally. Unfortunately, most relationships with a significant age gap are still stigmatized, which you’ll see in your friends and family’s behavior. While you’re not in the wrong (you deserve to be happy with whomever you are!), this could make you feel like you were. So, you need to handle this type of emotional pressure if you want to build your relationship with a much older/younger partner.
What Is the Acceptable Age Difference in a Relationship?
Ultimately, every age difference is acceptable as long as you are happy together. So, you shouldn’t worry about this much. Yet, if you’re afraid of the social implications of your relationship, there are some things you should consider.
What is the general acceptable age difference in a relationship? Typically, up to 10 years. What’s interesting is that in most heterosexual couples, the male partner is older. This means that it’s easier to move this acceptable age a bit further if you maintain this age dynamic. However, if your age gap is 10 years or higher, you might expect some unpleasant comments and experience the aforementioned stigma.
What is the acceptable age difference if you don’t want it to have an impact on your relationship? Well, what matters here is not the age but the stage of life you’re at. Even 2 years can make all the difference if one of the partners is still studying and the other has already been making a career for a year since your goals and everyday experiences differ significantly. On the other hand, the older you get, the less significant the difference will be since you’re more likely at the same stage of your life.
The Takeaway
Does age difference matter in a relationship? Yes and no. While it may make certain behaviors more likely, ultimately, it does not matter from the perspective of a long-term relationship—you either find the right partner or not. It may, however, matter emotionally since a significant age difference may be stigmatized. In that case, you need to be ready to face the people who don’t understand that love comes first.
You might also read: How to Make a Long-Distance Relationship Work? 5 Tips
